Well, I knew I would eventually figure it out. I've been pondering the verbal attack I endured that sent me into the Post Traumatic Stress Disorder event. I told you the nature of the beast is to go over and over and over the "conversation," or in this case the written message that she sent me. Even though I deleted it, and haven't been back to that site, it's been running through my mind on a loop, like a video tape.
I considered the poor etiquette of posting her comment into a blog of it's own .... wasn't what did it. It made me mad at first that she diss'd my military service, but that wasn't what threw me into PTSD. She made the comment the first time she reamed me out that "they" always tell every one to demonstrate with a 50 ft "don't tread on me" flag. Who are they to "tell everyone" anyway? Are they setting themselves up as dictators of the Tea Party movement? Did they self-impose a dictatorship upon every one else? Isn't that what we're fighting?
Isn't that exactly what Glenn Beck warned us about? Someone would try to take the horns of this movement and steer it for their own purposes. Well, I think I got a taste of that. I just got told to sit down and shut up, by someone on my side. Excuse me, I'm an American. I don't take kindly to that.
You see, there stems my Post Traumatic Stress. It's not military related. About now, if she reads this, she'll lay into an attack and say I'm trivializing PTSD. I had a very good friend about 16 years ago during my first attack of PTSD, when all my repressed memories first started coming forward, who taught me about this. He was from Viet Nam. I was the only person besides a fellow friend who was a police officer who could talk him down from his episodes. We were very close, I'd say as close as 2 people could be and not be lovers. If it weren't for him, I'd have thought I was having a bad acid trip. He never once told me I wasn't a real veteran because I didn't serve in Viet Nam. I'm sorry I wasn't born until 1963. I got into the Navy as soon as I could. The cold war was on when I got in, not an armed conflict. What was I supposed to do? Start one? I had the privilege of serving during the presidency of Ronald Reagan.
My PTSD comes from childhood abuse; from a manipulative, user and control freak. My warning to everyone else is to watch for people who would try to take this movement and use it for their own selfish gain. It's like Glenn said, this is not really a "movement." We as the American People are upset with the government and want to be heard. Anyone who wants to really turn it into a movement, and want to lead it, are really turning it into something because they want something. We want to change it BACK into what it used to be. They want fame. Remember what she said...."we always tell people to do it this way...." And who are you to tell people to do anything? I'm a veteran, I know how to treat my flag. I'm an American citizen, I know how to act, I don't need a parent to tell me what to do, even in a "movement," such as the tea party movement. If you think you need to tell me what to do, that makes you no better than big brother Obama and the socialist government who wanted to take our guns for our own good, take our booze, for our own good. If someone has a problem with my free speech, he can move to Europe.
Lori Ann Smith
I fight for Freedom how I dang please and if you don't like it, leave.
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